Now, you know, when I saw this article, I simply had to read about it. Apparently, the new craze, thanks to an oversharing media influencer, is testing your vagina for microbes… but like good and bad cholesterol, and you get a score. So a 100/100 means you’re in the top 1% of healthy vaginas. You can not make this shit up. I swear. But…not so fast, because there is a lot more to the story. As with anything out there on social media… consumers of social media propaganda, beware.

Fact: You can test the microbes in your vagina because everyone with a vagina has a vaginal microbiome made up of good and bad bacteria, which can affect our health.
Start-up companies like Evvy, June Bio, Tiny Health, and Daye have jumped onto this craze and offer direct-to-consumer test kits and coaching. Two of those start-ups, Evvy and Daye, also offer probiotics and supplements claiming to optimize the vagina. Although taking certain probiotics can also increase the share of good bacteria, it doesn’t work for everyone or in the long term, so buyer beware.
Nearly 30% of American women have bacterial vaginosis (BV), an overgrowth of certain harmful bacteria, and antibiotics only work for 40% of BV cases, while 60% suffer recurrence. Furthermore, it has not been determined whether the microbiome causes the BV recurrence cycle or is merely correlated with it. Researchers can’t even say whether or not any particular treatment for BV will actually prevent those outcomes.
Now here’s the really unfortunate news for those with BV…sex may not be so great, especially sex involving a penis because of the alkaline nature of semen. Vaginas are supposed to be acidic. Now, lesbians and lovers of oral sex, don’t get too excited or smug about this, because oral sex may not be as great either for picking up that bad bacteria. The bottom line: the less disruption you have into the vaginal microbiome, the better. The good news is that if you’re not prone to BV, you don’t have to worry! But if you are prone to it, you may want to get your partner involved in the treatment because new evidence suggests that bacteria associated with BV can be transmitted between sexual partners.
Is there a place for biome testing…maybe. Some women may benefit from biome tests, but only if you’re having issues. And don’t get it into your pretty little head or pretty little vagina that some vagnas are better than others. That’s just bullshit, as is a numerical score for a vagina…we have truly lost our senses when we start rating vaginas. Furthermore, just like with individuals carrying extra weight, that does not always mean those folks are unhealthy. The same is true for vaginas. Even if a person has more of the “bad” bacteria, that doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll have negative symptoms or a BV diagnosis. That’s where this new craze gets into the unethical…selling shit we don’t need based on a biome test.
This new craze even suggests that having a one percenter vagina might translate to a longer life. I tend to trust someone like Caroline Mitchell, MD, the director of the Vulvovaginal Disorders, who says, “The vaginal microbiome might mean your vagina is happy until 120, but I don’t think it’s going to change your life expectancy.”

So there you have it, all about vaginal microbes. I’m quite sure I’ve never gone into detail about this in any of my books. I’ve not even talked about using dental dams, yeast infections, etc because it isn’t very sexy. And this is why I write about this stuff in my blogs, but leave my books free of the non-sexy stuff…for the most part. On occasion, I might include something merely for comedic purposes! Want to check out my books? Feel free to click the links below.